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Caption Writing Contest Voting

5/29/2019

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The captions are in, and so now comes time for people to vote. Choose from the captions below and I will post the winners next week.
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    Which caption is the best?

Submit
Good luck!

-Bill
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New cartoon: He made an offensive tweet

9/27/2018

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I had a student write a paper about Snapchat last week, and I had to ask what it meant to put a "filter" on a picture--part of a growing body of evidence that the older I get, the more I don't know what my students are saying. Then I talked to the whole class about audience awareness, and how if you're writing to an audience who is unfamiliar with your topic, you have to explain more than usual. For example, the sentence, "he made an offensive tweet" would have been pretty meaningless thirteen years ago. Then I got this idea:
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I really get a kick out of words or phrases that either no longer mean anything, or in the case of "tweet," mean something completely different today. Some people think it's weird that the president tweets; I think it's weird and kind fascinating that people can even say, "The president tweets" and we know that doesn't mean he's taken to chirping like a bird of some kind.

There's also Facebook's effect on language. I like how "friend" became a verb ("he friended me"), and more ominously, people started "defriending" each other. It sounds so awful: Defriend. ::cue suspenseful music::

Do you have any favorite phrases or words that mean something completely different today?

-Bill
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New cartoon: Better to let sleeping dogs lie

9/26/2018

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I always loved watching Law & Order with my dad, and for some reason, a lot of my cartoon ideas take place in a court room. I blame this on him also letting me watch the Three Stooges' Disorder in the Court at such a young age.
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When we say, "better to let sleeping dogs lie," it means when you are thinking of broaching a topic that may cause more problems by talking about it or dealing with it directly, sometimes it's better to just let it be and ignore it (lest you wake up the angry dog). However, I never hear "lie" to mean sleep, so when I've heard it, I usually think of "lie" as in "to utter a falsehood." This idiom draws attention to the "lay" vs. "lie" grammar point: In prescriptive grammar, you should say, "I need to lie down," since it's intransitive. Some old school grammarians will say you cannot say "I need to lay down" since "lay" is traditionally transitive, meaning you need to have an object: "I need to lay down some bricks" or "I need to lay tiles." Still, plenty of people say, "I need to lay down for a nap" and everyone knows there are no bricks or tiles involved. I think the real solution is never let your English teachers hear you talk about napping.

I didn't mean to start debating the use of lay vs. lie. Perhaps I should have let sleeping dogs lay down.

-Bill
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New cartoon: To cost an arm and a leg

9/25/2018

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I used to live and work in the Flint area when I taught at the University of Michigan-Flint, and there are so many things I miss from that time. Most of all, I miss my friends that I made there and wish I could visit them more easily, but I also miss the little things. There were so many wonderful restaurants. My favorites were Bangkok Peppers, Grill of India, Taboon's. I heard good things about Badawest, but sadly, I never got to try it even though my students all said it was the best Lebanese food. There was also the Korean market that we still stop by whenever we're in the area to buy sweet potato noodles and kim and ddeok and... oh! I have to stop!

One practical thing I missed was low-cost high-speed internet. I remember paying $40 a month for AT&T, and now I pay 50% more for a lower speed. Sometimes I tell myself, "This is ridiculous! I don't need the Internet! I will just cancel it and go to my local library!" but then the bill comes in the mail and I grudgingly pay it, and that makes me think of this:
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When something "costs an arm and a leg," it just means it's very expensive. I remember any time I shared this idiom with my students, they always laughed and pantomimed pulling off their arms and legs. "Yeah, well sometimes you really want something," I'd say,  "but it really is that expensive! So what do you do?"

Do you have any other idioms you'd like to see drawn that have to do with costs and money (or arms and legs for that matter)?

Have a good one, and don't pay an arm and a leg if you can avoid it!

-Bill
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New Cartoon: A heavy-handed debate + rhetorical advice

9/21/2018

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My composition students have begun a new unit (one class on analyzing rhetoric and another producing a persuasive essay). One of the things we talked about was appeals to emotion, how you don't want to be too cold, but you also don't want to be too emotional and heavy-handed about it:
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According to the OED,  early uses from the 1600's alluded to stories like Moses' hands being heavy from holding them up during battle, so it used to mean clumsy as from exhaustion. Today, at least when I've heard it, it has come to mean an over-the-top quality like being overly emotional. See Jim Gaffigan's commentary on Sarah McLachlan's animal shelter videos:
While it's possible to be a little too heavy-handed, it's also possible to be a little too emotionless:
So with using emotional appeals, you really have to toe the line (maybe this will be a future cartoon). Sometimes you're writing in an academic context where a cold, emotionless approach is favored, but you might also be writing a letter to the editor or friend and need to show your emotions on an issue so no one thinks you're a robot.

Have a good one, and good luck out there!

-Bill
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New Cartoon: Grin and Bear It

9/20/2018

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From a very young age, whenever my dad experienced difficulties, he said, "Kid, sometimes you have to grin and bear it." This was apparently fatherly wisdom passed down from his father. My dad always said it as if the meaning was self-evident, but as a child, I always took it to mean you should grin but be tough like a bear.
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I may not have understood the meaning exactly right, but if you bear your burdens, that certainly does make you tough.

Can you think of any other idioms involving bears?

Have a good one and good luck out there!

-Bill
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New Cartoon: "A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words"

9/19/2018

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My Facebook page recently reached over 1,000 likes, and so as a thank you, I thought of an idiom with the word "thousand" in it:
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The phrase apparently originated at the turn of the 20th century and came to mean that pictures can sometimes "say" far more than words. I wanted to play on this idea, so I didn't put any words in the second picture. What do you think they're each saying or thinking?

Can you think of any other idioms with the word "thousand" in it?

Hope your day goes well. Good luck out there!

-Bill
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New Cartoon: Play It by Ear

12/12/2017

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This is one of my favorite idioms and one I have to explain to students a lot:
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A person who can "play by ear" is a person who can imitate and play a song without reading the music for it. In conversation, it has come to mean, "let's improvise" or "let's see how it goes" or quite literally, "let's not plan out every detail ahead of time and instead react to changes in circumstance in the moment as they happen." For example, when Miami Heat player Dwayne Wade dislocated his shoulder in a game against the Rockets in 2007, President Pat Riley said he wanted to "limit Wade's minutes to about 20 a game." Wade was not fully healed, so Riley said:
"He's not back yet... He's going to need seven games. He's going to need whatever time it is. We'll have to play it by ear."

​In other words, the player wasn't fully healed, and Riley couldn't speak too soon about when he would be able to play a full game.

​-Bill

Source: Nance, R. (2007, April 10) Wade rejoins Shaq as playoffs loom; Heat didn't lose a step without star guard, USA Today, Sports pp. 3C.
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New Cartoon + Bonus Story about Prawn

3/7/2017

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Spelling mistakes used to bother me a lot and get under my skin, but now I just try to see the humor in it and remind students to re-read their papers slowly. Here is my stock advice that is programmed by a macro to populate a Word comment bubble:
Please spellcheck your essay before submitting it. Try to read through your document slowly by using your finger or the eraser-side of a pencil to slow down your reading. This will help you read more slowly and catch mistakes.

Below is an old cartoon I made a couple years ago based on a typo I found in set of chess instructions: "The prawn [sic] moves straight ahead, never backwards." I was so tickled by the image of the shrimp's cousin scuttling across a chess board that I simply had to draw it. I tried to capture a look of defiance on the prawn's face, as if to say, "No, I'm not moving back. Haven't you read the rules?"

Still, I'm thankful for inadvertently funny spelling errors. Without them, grading would be made a little less funny (very easy to do that), and I would never think thoughts like this:
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"The prawn [sic] moves straight ahead, never backwards."
Bonus: A story about my first encounter with a prawn!

Read More
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New Cartoon: A Misunderstanding of the Passive

2/28/2017

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Here is an old cartoon (for me) but a new cartoon for you. I was teaching the passive voice a while back, and I had to make this point via the white board in response to a very frustrated grammar student asking, "Why can't I say, 'The soup is tasting John'?":
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That's why you can't say "the soup is tasting John"! Okay, so it really looks like the soup is eating John (maybe he's a really aggressive taster?), but the point is these two sentences are not equivalent although they may seem like it to students who haven't learned how to use passive voice yet.

Students are also resistant to using it at first and will mark it wrong on a test because they learn that stative verbs cannot take a progressive form. For example, we cannot say "He is being a lawyer now" or "I am seeing a bird out the window now." This sentence ("The soup is being tasted by John") is the passive form of "John is tasting the soup." It is not the copula "is" in the progressive form.

Anyway, have a good one, and don't let any soup taste you!

-Bill
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New Video: How Many Vowels Does English Have?

2/23/2017

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I posted a new video to my YouTube channel. Here it is:
I have been wanting to make this video for such a long time, but I've also been making a bunch of excuses. Finally, I couldn't take it any longer and had to record it (now that I bought Camtasia, I have a lot of motivation to get off my butt and record things).

Quick synopsis/spoiler: There are not only 5 vowels in English. There are 15 vowels. Whenever I say this, I typically get this reaction (pictured at right):

"THERE ARE FIVE VOWELS, A, E, I, O, U. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5! OH, AND Y, SOMETIMES Y. THAT'S SIX. KIND OF."
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Well, we may have 5 letters, I say, but they are often inadequate to capture all the different sounds. Look at these 3 English words:
  • flood
  • foot
  • food
All of them have the same letters in the middle, but they are all clearly different, right? That leads to this reaction (pictured left).
They finally give up the fight, hang their head in academic shame, and proclaim me the winner...


Actually, it's more like this:
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Anyway, there are still 15 actual sounds in Midwestern American English, so there! (runs away quickly)

-Bill
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New Cartoon: "Please, bear with me..."

9/9/2015

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This expression came up in class last week. During a complicated explanation, I asked the class to bear with me ("be patient with me"), and then I asked them what that phrase meant, and they only knew about the animal bear:
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It actually comes from the meaning of the word "bear" which means "to carry." I think the idea is to carry the burden of the communication encounter (when things aren't clear, the load gets pretty heavy on the part of the listener). 

Let's all bear with each other!

-Bill
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    Hi! I'm Bill.

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    I'm all about making English more accessible to English language learners and their teachers. Click here to learn more about me and my site.
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